Challenging unhelpful stories
Last weekend I started swearing.
Not that I haven't sworn in my life to date. It's just that most of it occurs in my head.
I've been too afraid to swear out loud - a fear that comes from my childhood when when I was told my mouth would be washed out with soap if I did.
Clarity Comes from Calmness and Connection
I've just finished reading Corey Muscara's Stop Missing Your Life - a fabulous book about cultivating presence.
It captured my attention as the quality of presence is a key ingredient for maintaining clarity when you speak, and for sourcing the confidence that comes when you feel comfortable in your own skin.
Read MoreWhat's really needed to take action
I've been thinking about commitment as an attribute for taking action.
It's often put forward as a key ingredient for generating results. The theory goes that if you really want something, as long as you're 100% committed, you'll take the action necessary to get it.
Disperse your nervous energy
Our family dog Gracie suffers an anxious reaction to the sound of electric hair clippers. As soon as she hears the noise, she disappears under the bed, shaking until we've stopped using them.
Read MoreStaying Calm and Remaining Confident
One of my earliest memories of being challenged to speak up for myself was ordering lunch on the first day of Year 3. Having graduated from 'infant' to primary school, the system for lunch orders was different. The wire basket that usually sat at the front of the room into which we'd place our brown paper bags, wasn't there.
Read MoreHiding and hindering by holding back
Are you a nice person? Were you taught to use your manners, be polite, wait your turn and follow the rules?
This is useful advice as being 'nice' has many benefits.
Triple the Impact of Your Message
Last week I facilitated a small group session on speaking to be heard - how to deliver a message with impact. The theme was based on the premise that when you're wanting to speak and ensure your point lands, it pays to deliver your message clearly, concisely and in a way that's easy to remember.
Read MoreYour Voice is Seeded in Silence
If we spoke today and I asked how you were going, what would you say?
After ‘fine’, ‘great’ or ‘feeling unwell' would your next response be ‘busy’? Have you been flat out, chasing your tail, rushing toward deadlines, driving from one thing to the next?
Getting intentional about your voice
If you've seen the movie King Richard, one of the rituals you will have noticed is that every time Richard Williams takes his daughters Venus and Serena to tennis practise, they hang a homemade sign on the fence with this quote by Benjamin Franklin:
"If you fail to plan, you plan to fail".
Staying in your power and reclaiming the floor
One of the nuances of human conversation is our tendency to interrupt each other when we speak.
We find it hard to contain our excitement at contributing, adding or providing another opinion so we interject when we're listening to someone else speak.
With a school teacher as a mother and a headmaster as a grandfather, it's not surprising there were many rules in my family growing up.
There was no watching television during the day, leaving the dinner table without asking to be excused, saying anything unless it was something nice, and there was certainly no swearing or our mouth would be "washed out with soap"…
Read MoreMake your dreams bigger than your fears
My son Isaac was born with a condition called Spondylo-epiphyseal dysplasia. A bit of a tongue twister for what, in essence, is a type of short stature. His adult height is 140cm or 4ft 6inches.
Isaac's always had great friends and his height difference wasn't a social issue until he was around 6 years old and decided he wanted to play soccer.
Read MoreWhat to do when your thoughts disappear
One of the most memorable phrases shared by a coaching client last year was the challenge that every time she stands up to speak, her 'thoughts fly away like seagulls.'
It was such a brilliant metaphor and came shortly after I'd experienced a mind-blank - an occasion where I stood up to speak in front of a small group and nothing came forward - my words had unexpectedly packed up and deserted me.
From Fixing Up to Opening Up
Have you ever restored something old to make it new again? Renovated an old house to reveal its original features?
Refurbished an old car or boat to bring back its former glory? Or maybe, like me, refreshed a character infused worn chair to give it new life?
Read MoreGetting Your Point Across
Last week I was captivated by the powerful speeches delivered by Grace Tame and Brittany Higgins to the National Press Club.
Watching them speak, it was notable that they didn't mince their words, hide behind others or apologise for talking about topics that may make people feel uncomfortable.
Finding Strength from Within
Is it just me or do you ever feel you were born into the wrong decade?
Sometimes I think I belong more to the 1950's than the 2000's.
I love 1950's movies, fashion, Ford Thunderbirds and rocking around the clock.
How You Feel Reveals Who You Are
To kick the year off I'm delving into the value of feeling your feelings.
Having grown up in a family where difficult emotions were mostly covered up, ignored and brushed under the carpet, it's not been a topic I've felt particularly comfortable exploring.
How to Handle Difficult Questions
Are you heading off to a family and friends gathering this Christmas and rather than being excited about the prospect, you’re dreading the conversation?
If so, here’s a tool that will assist you handle difficult questions with power and grace.
Embracing Your Superpower
I loved super-heroes growing up.
Wonder Woman, Cat Woman and Superman were some of my favourites. While I enjoyed dressing up and pretending to be one I never thought I'd actually meet one - until last week.
Read MoreConnect to Your Purpose
Last week I ran a poll on social media asking people "what's the main barrier that stops you speaking up at work?"
The most popular response was worrying what other people will think. If you can relate, here’s how to stop.
