Power and Courage

Why Personal Power is Key in the Long Run

If you've ever held back from speaking up and then shared your experience with someone, you may have been told "perhaps you just need more courage."

Or maybe you've tried giving yourself a pep talk or adopting the Nike approach of 'just do it!' to propel yourself to take action.

While these strategies are useful, especially if the stakes are high, they can also take a great deal of emotional energy.

I remember the first day of primary school for example, when I was struggling to ask the teacher how to order my lunch. My 7 year old self thought he was a bit scary with his beard, jeans and loud voice.

So I hesitated to put my hand up to ask how to place a lunch order. At the same time however, I was also grappling with the fear of being starving if I had no food! So I drew on all my courage and took action in the face of fear – I put my hand up and asked.

This experience, and others like it, can be quite draining. If you have to draw on that much energy each time you want to speak up and ask for what you want, it can be exhausting!

What we need therefore, to make speaking up easier, is a greater dose of personal power.

Personal power is defined in different ways. Martin Luther King for example defined it as the ability to achieve purpose and affect change. Gillian Stokes in her book Personal Power defines it as a high level of self esteem and in psychology it’s linked to inner strength and confidence.

My favourite definition however comes from Arthur Joseph, author of a book called Voice of Leader who says:

"Personal power is not being afraid of what you think of me when I am merely being me."

Adopting this definition means that while courage is action in the presence of fear, power is present in the absence of fear. The closer you are to being your true and authentic self, without worrying about what others think, the closer you are to accessing your power.

When you have more personal power it then takes less courage, and therefore less emotional energy, to speak up – you are freed up from the fear, anxiety and stress that you may otherwise be grappling with. This in turn creates more freedom in your mind to get on with other things.

Overall, while courage is important in the moment, it’s personal power that will help you consistently find your voice over time. When you can speak up regularly and with ease, your influence grows, you'll find it easier to ask for what you want, experience deeper and more connected relationships, and as a result, feel more fully seen, heard and valued for your true and authentic self.

Have a great week being more of who you already are.